The Art of Being Yourself – How to Live Authentically
“The more yourself you are, the less competition you have.”
This phrase has stuck with me for quite some time, although I can’t quite recall where I first encountered it. The moment I heard it, I jotted it down in my phone.
Many of us resonate with the feeling of societal conditioning. I, for instance, have had to unlearn certain behaviors rooted in my childhood, notably the tendency to fret over others’ opinions.
Growing up in a conservative household, my choice of clothing was often scrutinized. I was discouraged from wearing baggy pants simply because “girls shouldn’t.” Every time I contemplated making a unique choice, I was met with the admonition, “What will people say!?” As a young adult, I was often advised against standing up for myself, being told instead to simply “let it go,” even when I felt genuinely hurt.
I vividly remember comparing myself to a classmate who was not only stunning and intelligent but also different from me in many ways. Although I loved my best friend and admired her, I frequently felt overshadowed by her accomplishments. Long after we had taken different paths in life, I still viewed her as successful, while I struggled with feelings of confusion and inadequacy.
This pattern continues into adulthood. We allow others to dictate what “success” means, losing sight of our own identities in the process. By immersing ourselves in other people’s lives, we often hide our own distinctions.
Not everyone excels academically or possesses artistic talent, but we all have something unique to contribute to the world. Unfortunately, over time, many of us forget this fact.
A healthier approach to measuring success is to compete with yourself rather than comparing yourself to others. Embracing authenticity allows you to define your own version of success rather than relying on others to create that definition for you.
This journey of self-discovery is what living authentically is all about.
THE ART OF BEING YOURSELF – HOW TO LIVE AUTHENTICALLY
EXPLORE
Nurture your sense of wonder—the innate curiosity we often lose over time. Seek out adventure, even in mundane daily tasks. Responsibilities such as bills, schooling, and family obligations can drain that adventurous spirit we all once had.
Life tends to remind us of our shortcomings: things we wish we had, places we long to visit, and dreams yet to be realized. However, you cannot let these thoughts diminish your desire for excitement. The onus is on you to incite change in your life.
MEDITATE
One of the simplest yet effective ways to reconnect with your true self is through meditation. This practice can help you find the calm amidst life’s chaos.
Dedicate some quiet time for yourself, even if it’s just 5-10 minutes a day. Allow yourself to slow down. Begin with guided meditations or utilize an app like this one.
Engaging in meditation can foster inner peace, leading to greater calm in your life. In my own meditation journey, I’ve often found myself moved to tears by the profound sense of peace I’ve encountered. If you feel lost, meditation can be a transformative starting point.
JOURNAL
Journaling is one of my favorite ways to reconnect with myself. It provides clarity, enabling you to see your life, goals, and desires from a fresh perspective. Writing helps to clear your mind and can illuminate any misplaced fears or anxieties.
Pose questions to yourself and document your answers. A good starting point is a workbook/guide like this one. Here are some questions to consider:
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What are my goals?
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What am I afraid of?
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What are my strengths?
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What makes me feel good?
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What are some of my personal gifts?
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Is there anything holding me back from living more authentically?
When we drift away from our true selves, we often agree with others despite holding different opinions. We might find ourselves saying “yes” to activities that do not resonate with us, forgetting what we genuinely want. Journaling can serve as a powerful tool to rediscover your needs and desires.
BE FEARLESS
How many times have you had an intriguing idea only to dismiss it with, “nahh… that’s silly”? It’s crucial to take risks and pursue your goals.
Living authentically requires courage. While some may find it easy, others grapple with the fear of embracing their uniqueness.
“To be yourself in a world that is constantly trying to make you something else is the greatest accomplishment.” ~ Ralph Waldo Emerson. Challenge yourself to take small risks that might feel uncomfortable but can lead to a rewarding sense of achievement. Treat yourself to a nice dinner, watch a movie solo, travel alone, enroll in a class, or volunteer in your community.
Embrace solitude. Engaging in solo activities can reveal much about who you are, especially when you step outside your comfort zone. I have discovered that I am braver than I often realize. While solitude can be daunting, it also provides a unique opportunity to uncover new interests or unexpected talents.
While being fearless isn’t always simple, it can pave the way for a deeper understanding of yourself, empowering you to live life on your own terms.
In a world full of distractions like social media, it’s easy to get caught up in others’ narratives. We often start defining our self-worth based on someone else’s life journey. This is not what authenticity looks like.
Stop seeking validation from everyone.
Stop engaging in activities that don’t resonate with you.
Don’t wait for others to approve of your choices.
Stand firm in your beliefs, even if they differ from the crowd.
Focus on being who you really are.
You are beautifully unique, and to share your gifts with the world, you must choose to live authentically. Stop wasting time worrying about others’ opinions and their definitions of success. Now is the time to simply be you.
